Friday, 2 March 2012

Hi 'readers' I wanted to write here that I am alive and very uninspired to post things here, yes its another uninspired phase. I must suck as a blogger. I have been just going to uni and staring at my white wall that I've just recently stuck some photographs on it. The thing is, I don't really know what the thing is. I'm just lacking something,sparkle. I having been painting though and writing on my journals and diaries and sketchbooks and I am a mess and perfectionist. I buy all of these wicked agendas and skechbooks aimed to fill them with great work. But from the second I write on its page I immediately dislike the content I have written,also the handwriting itself and I feel like starting over on a different page, different journal and its never good enough and I tell myself..Stef you are neurotic. So I have all of these unfinished work and no place to stock these journals hah I must be really pathetic. Anyway I've shot some outfit images I'll be posting tomorrow. Today I will just watch a film, at least it will stop me from thinking too much.

Today I was talking to this guy and he kept looking deep into my eyes and talking all excited, at the beginning of the talk I was really paying attention but I have this problem, that when the person talk too much and I have only the option to listen, smile and emit sounds like ohh, huh, hmm then I start to get a bit embarrased and all of the sudden I find myself not paying attention to anything he is saying but analysing and thinking that if I look too much into his eyes it will be odd, but in the other hand if I look somewhere else I will be rude and it will be as if I am not interested in what he is saying..which maybe can be the reason I got distracted in the first place. Gosh enoughh hh its so cold now. I hate when the weather is a bit warm and theres sunshine and you think oh summer is coming and then the next day is foggy and cold its like 'the weather' is saying..summer? haha not yet you fool that was just a 'free sample'.

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